Mother guilt, as we’ve discussed before on this podcast, seems to be the epidemic of the modern age.
Our guest today, author Megan Dalla-Caminia starts our conversation with a quote from Adrianna Huffington: “When they take the baby out they put the guilt in”. Is this your experience of motherhood?
As a single parent working in the corporate sector Megan became something of an expert on mother guilt. She felt guilty at work for not being with her son, and guilty when she took time to be with him for not putting the time into work. She felt under a constant cloud of never being good enough, never doing anything well enough.
When her son–now 18–entered his teenage years Megan started working on a book, Simple. Soulful. Sacred, which she wrote with time poor readers in mind, and describes as an invitation for women to lead a more meaningful, purposeful and aligned life.
In today’s episode Megan gives some fantastic tips for mothers to overcome the mother-guilt, and experience freedom and joy.
Mother Guilt was made possible with the generous support of the Community Broadcasting Foundation.
Show Notes – Mother Guilt with Megan Dalla-Camina
- So often as mums we focus on the negative, the things we’re doing wrong. However, we can create new patterns of thought, and choose each time to look at the positive instead.
- The more you do it the easier it will become, and when you do it consistently you’ll start to notice a shift in yourself and your whole attitude.
- Learn to be present where you are. Our feelings of guilt come from not being fully present, or feeling bad for the feeling that you should be somewhere else. When you’ve got intentionalised time with your kids, put down your phone, turn off the TV. Listen to what they want to tell you, don’t focus on something else.
- Similarly, when you’re at work, focus on work, and remind yourself to be okay with this.
- Practice self-compassion. We can be so hard on ourselves as mothers. Remember, even when you’re getting it wrong you’re doing the best you can with what you have in front of you. Learn to validate yourself. When we do this we’re teaching our kids to ease up on themselves as well.
- Practice self care for yourself every single day. Do something good for yourself. It doesn’t need to be a big thing, maybe a walk in the park, a nice cup of tea, whatever is special for you. Simple things can make a big difference.
Megan’s book, Simple. Soulful. Sacred is available in bookshops around the country, and all the online distributors.