Today’s guest today is Brett Farrell, who hosts the “Fatherhood” with Brett Farrell podcast. One of the interesting revelations that Brett came across over his first few podcasts was the amount of men talking about dealing with anger. The discussions were on different topics, but anger became a noticeable recurring theme.
This was a great encouragement to Brett, who had struggled with his own feelings of anger. He says dads often aren’t as well-versed in discussing their feelings as mums tend to be, which can make things difficult for them.
Brett’s aim, through this interview, is to help encourage other dads–and the mums who love them.
Show Notes – Dealing with Anger with Brett Farrell
- Nearly all dads, it appears, are dealing with anger. This discussion isn’t an attempt to make it acceptable, but create a starting point for a conversation.
- The anger generally starts as frustration which boils to a tipping point. It then manifests as an outburst: shouting, hitting walls, sometimes even physical violence. What is this showing our young sons and daughters?
- Anger is a bigger problem than men admit, or can solve by themselves. Universally dads are experiencing anger, and almost universally they don’t want to be that way. There’s a desire to change, to be better, and a desire not to teach their children to be that way.
- We can’t do it alone. It’s okay to admit “I need help with this”. If you’re struggling and can’t get help from friends or family, seek professional help with the underlying causes, the things that cause the anger to bubble over. There’s no shame in getting help!
- Reducing anxiety helps, as does having support from other people.
- Men are unlikely to do anything about dealing with anger, or seek help, if not prompted to. As a wife or partner it’s okay to force the conversation–if you feel safe in your relationship to do this.
- On the whole, men want to be great dads. They want to balance fun, joy and laughter with discipline and character shaping, and all the other things they’ve got to do. It’s great to encourage the dads in your life, and remind them that they’re doing a great job.
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